Faith, Doubt, Mystery ― A Catholic Journey

In Faith, Doubt, Mystery: A Catholic Journey, psychologist James J. Tracy revisits his six-year-old self taking the first steps on his Catholic journey. Illness slowed the young boy physically while ramping up his time alone to think about God and eternity. Parochial school and his family’s commitment to Catholicism soldered him in his faith. Tracy offers his readers a vivid portrait of belief and naivete in a questioning adolescent keenly aware of heaven and hell. His teenage years were a melting pot of religious fervor and guilt—a mixture that eventually catapulted him into the Jesuit Order. Tracy takes the reader into a Jesuit life that few outside the Order know. There, discipline and rich education sharpened his intellect while making it clear that many topics were off-limits. In particular, his study of theology took him in directions he didn’t expect and often couldn’t accept. Without ignoring the humor and camaraderie of religious life, Tracy conveys the emotional whiplash of coming of age in the turbulent 60s as he studied and taught as a Jesuit. Ultimately, doubts and disillusion prompted Tracy to choose psychology over the priesthood. As a psychologist and thinker Tracy shares what he eventually found, salting his memoir with dry wit and provocative ideas. He avoids the cynicism and bitter attacks often launched by ex-Catholics or those looking at the Church from the outside. His experience spawned acceptance of human limits and brought peace in facing the inevitable end of life. Those who are facing quandaries, life choices, or what’s last in life are likely to find encouragement in this candid memoir.