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This book is about me.
It tells the deeply hideous story
of what happens when my mother dies
and I'm dragged three thousand miles away
from my gorgeous boyfriend, Ray,
to live in L.A. with my father,
who I've never even met
because he's such a scumbag that he
divorced my mom before I was born.
The only way I've ever even seen him
is in the movies,
since he's this megafamous actor
who's been way too busy
trying to win Oscars
to even visit me once in fifteen years.
Everyone loves my father.
Everyone but me.
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