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◎【好書】 一位不閱讀好書的人,他比那些不能讀書的人並沒有佔優勢。
◎【價值】 當一個人的智力和內心是空虛的,肚子吃得飽只有很小的價值。
◎【社會】 一個人的知識愈少,他所發出的噪音愈大,而他所得到的薪資愈高。
◎【人生】 擁有好朋友、好書、以及一個迷糊的良知,這就是理想的人生。
◎【謊言】 只有頭腦僵硬的教化才能使一個人從一個謊言中找到事實。
◎【無用】 針對已經生病的想像力,展示證明是沒有用處的。
------ 馬克吐溫
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
【快樂】(Happiness)
『快樂不是一件自我存在的東西,它僅是與其他不快樂事情的一個相對比照,這就是快樂的整個情況。』
"Happiness ain't a thing in itself --- it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant. That's all it is."
【人窮志短】(Money)
『缺乏錢財是所有罪惡的根源。』
"The lack of money is the root of all evil."
【大不敬】(True irreverence)
『真正的大不敬是不尊重別人的神。』
"True irreverence is disrespect for another man's god."
【宗教神學】(Theology)
『人類是唯一的動物,他愛護他的鄰居就如同愛護他自己一樣,但是如果對方的宗教神學有問題,他會割斷對方的喉嚨。』
"He is the only animal that loves his neighbor as himself, and cut his throat if his theology isn't straight."
【珍貴的資產】(Valuable Possession)
『每一個人生下來都擁有一項資產,它比其他所有的資產價值都高,就是他最後的一口氣。』
"Each person is born to one possession which outvalues all his others --- his last breath."
【良好的教養】(Good Breeding)
『良好的教養在於隱藏我們對自己較佳的評價,以及隱藏我們對他人較差的評價。』
"Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person."
【名聲】(Fame)
『「名聲」如同是蒸氣,「聲望」如同是意外,在地球上唯一可以確定的事情是被遺忘掉。』
"Fame is vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion."
【原則與偏見】(Principles)
『「原則」是「偏見」的另一個名稱。』
"Principles is another name for prejudice."
【迷信】(Superstition)
『被大膽說出的預言,從來不會被迷信的人認為是愚笨無趣的。』
"Prophecies boldly uttered never fall barren on superstitious ears."
【需要】(Necessity)
『「需要」不認識任何的「法律」。』
"Necessity knows no law."
【愛情】(Love)
『當你為愛情而釣魚時,要用你的心當作餌,而不是用你的腦筋。』
"When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain."
【人心不足】(Rich and Poor)
『如果所有的人都是富有的,那麼所有的人都是貧窮的。』
"If all men were rich, all men would be poor."
【意料不及】(Surprise)
『經常要坦白地承認一項過失錯誤,這將使你的上司意料防備不及,才會給你一個機會去犯更多的錯誤。』
"Always acknowledge a fault frankly. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more."
【事實】(Facts)
『首先去取得你的事實,然後你才能夠隨心所欲的扭曲誤解它。』
"Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you like."
【敵人】(Enemy)
『一個人最危險的敵人是他自己的口舌。』
"The deadly enemy of a man, his own tongue...."
【惡意】(Maliciousness)
『一本懷有惡意的書籍將不會傷害到任何人,除了寫作它的傻瓜。』
"A malignant book would hurt nobody but the fool who wrote it."
【預言】(Prophesying)
『預言是唯一的一項人類技術,它是無法經由練習而改善。』
"Prophesying was the only human art that couldn't be improved by practice."
【聖經與驚訝】(Bibles)
『當一個人閱讀聖經時,他對上帝所知程度的驚訝是低於他對上帝所不知程度的驚訝。』
"When one reads Bibles, one is less surprised at what the Deity knows than at what he doesn't know."
【亞當】(Adam)
『亞當真是一位老糊塗,他本來一切事情都很順利,而且他已經成功的贏得社區內最漂亮女孩子的芳心,但是他對自己的征服成果卻感到不滿足,他必須去吃那一顆可憐的小蘋果。』
"What a fool old Adam was. Had everything his own way; had succeeded in gaining the love of the best looking girl in the neighborhood, but yet unsatisfied with his conquest he had to eat a miserable little apple."
【印度】(India)
『印度擁有兩百萬個神,他們崇拜所有的這些神。在宗教上其他的國家都是窮人,印度是唯一的「百萬富翁」。』
"India has 2,000,000 gods, and worships them all. In religion other countries are paupers; India is the only millionaire."
【忘恩負義】(Ungrateful)
『如果你收養了一隻饑餓可憐的狗,並且讓牠舒適順利,牠將不會咬你,這便是一個人與一隻狗之間最主要的差別。』
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
【神學家】(Theologist)
『沒有一個世紀,也沒有一個國家曾經缺少過這樣的專家,他們能夠知道上帝的心思,而且也願意表示出來。』
"There was never a century nor a country that was short of experts who knew the Deity's mind and were willing to reveal it."
【回程票】(Return Ticket)
『有一個人從天堂來到人間旅遊,他所使用的是有效三十天的減價票,他試圖要把他的回程票賣掉。』
"Ingersoll's story of the man that went down from heaven on a reduced-rate excursion ticket good for 30 days --- and tried to sell his return ticket."
◎【價值】 當一個人的智力和內心是空虛的,肚子吃得飽只有很小的價值。
◎【社會】 一個人的知識愈少,他所發出的噪音愈大,而他所得到的薪資愈高。
◎【人生】 擁有好朋友、好書、以及一個迷糊的良知,這就是理想的人生。
◎【謊言】 只有頭腦僵硬的教化才能使一個人從一個謊言中找到事實。
◎【無用】 針對已經生病的想像力,展示證明是沒有用處的。
------ 馬克吐溫
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
【快樂】(Happiness)
『快樂不是一件自我存在的東西,它僅是與其他不快樂事情的一個相對比照,這就是快樂的整個情況。』
"Happiness ain't a thing in itself --- it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant. That's all it is."
【人窮志短】(Money)
『缺乏錢財是所有罪惡的根源。』
"The lack of money is the root of all evil."
【大不敬】(True irreverence)
『真正的大不敬是不尊重別人的神。』
"True irreverence is disrespect for another man's god."
【宗教神學】(Theology)
『人類是唯一的動物,他愛護他的鄰居就如同愛護他自己一樣,但是如果對方的宗教神學有問題,他會割斷對方的喉嚨。』
"He is the only animal that loves his neighbor as himself, and cut his throat if his theology isn't straight."
【珍貴的資產】(Valuable Possession)
『每一個人生下來都擁有一項資產,它比其他所有的資產價值都高,就是他最後的一口氣。』
"Each person is born to one possession which outvalues all his others --- his last breath."
【良好的教養】(Good Breeding)
『良好的教養在於隱藏我們對自己較佳的評價,以及隱藏我們對他人較差的評價。』
"Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person."
【名聲】(Fame)
『「名聲」如同是蒸氣,「聲望」如同是意外,在地球上唯一可以確定的事情是被遺忘掉。』
"Fame is vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion."
【原則與偏見】(Principles)
『「原則」是「偏見」的另一個名稱。』
"Principles is another name for prejudice."
【迷信】(Superstition)
『被大膽說出的預言,從來不會被迷信的人認為是愚笨無趣的。』
"Prophecies boldly uttered never fall barren on superstitious ears."
【需要】(Necessity)
『「需要」不認識任何的「法律」。』
"Necessity knows no law."
【愛情】(Love)
『當你為愛情而釣魚時,要用你的心當作餌,而不是用你的腦筋。』
"When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain."
【人心不足】(Rich and Poor)
『如果所有的人都是富有的,那麼所有的人都是貧窮的。』
"If all men were rich, all men would be poor."
【意料不及】(Surprise)
『經常要坦白地承認一項過失錯誤,這將使你的上司意料防備不及,才會給你一個機會去犯更多的錯誤。』
"Always acknowledge a fault frankly. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more."
【事實】(Facts)
『首先去取得你的事實,然後你才能夠隨心所欲的扭曲誤解它。』
"Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you like."
【敵人】(Enemy)
『一個人最危險的敵人是他自己的口舌。』
"The deadly enemy of a man, his own tongue...."
【惡意】(Maliciousness)
『一本懷有惡意的書籍將不會傷害到任何人,除了寫作它的傻瓜。』
"A malignant book would hurt nobody but the fool who wrote it."
【預言】(Prophesying)
『預言是唯一的一項人類技術,它是無法經由練習而改善。』
"Prophesying was the only human art that couldn't be improved by practice."
【聖經與驚訝】(Bibles)
『當一個人閱讀聖經時,他對上帝所知程度的驚訝是低於他對上帝所不知程度的驚訝。』
"When one reads Bibles, one is less surprised at what the Deity knows than at what he doesn't know."
【亞當】(Adam)
『亞當真是一位老糊塗,他本來一切事情都很順利,而且他已經成功的贏得社區內最漂亮女孩子的芳心,但是他對自己的征服成果卻感到不滿足,他必須去吃那一顆可憐的小蘋果。』
"What a fool old Adam was. Had everything his own way; had succeeded in gaining the love of the best looking girl in the neighborhood, but yet unsatisfied with his conquest he had to eat a miserable little apple."
【印度】(India)
『印度擁有兩百萬個神,他們崇拜所有的這些神。在宗教上其他的國家都是窮人,印度是唯一的「百萬富翁」。』
"India has 2,000,000 gods, and worships them all. In religion other countries are paupers; India is the only millionaire."
【忘恩負義】(Ungrateful)
『如果你收養了一隻饑餓可憐的狗,並且讓牠舒適順利,牠將不會咬你,這便是一個人與一隻狗之間最主要的差別。』
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
【神學家】(Theologist)
『沒有一個世紀,也沒有一個國家曾經缺少過這樣的專家,他們能夠知道上帝的心思,而且也願意表示出來。』
"There was never a century nor a country that was short of experts who knew the Deity's mind and were willing to reveal it."
【回程票】(Return Ticket)
『有一個人從天堂來到人間旅遊,他所使用的是有效三十天的減價票,他試圖要把他的回程票賣掉。』
"Ingersoll's story of the man that went down from heaven on a reduced-rate excursion ticket good for 30 days --- and tried to sell his return ticket."
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