Red Flags ― How to Spot Frenemies, Underminers, and Toxic People in Every Part of Your Life

We all need emotional blinders: the etiquette that keeps society smoothly moving depends on it. But when you absolutely must rely on another person, you have to be able to assess them objectively. RED FLAGS shares simple strategies anyone can use to spot deceptive or downright dangerous people who use ingratiation and social convention to draw in and lull victims.

Readers will learn how even the most skeptical of us use rose-colored lenses on those around us, in three sections:
—Blinded by Desire—from the alluring lenses of attraction and positive attention to the blindness of marital "bliss" and the distorted lens of delusion
—Overlooking Red Flags in a Professional Setting—how reassuring proximity and the false security of credibility and similarity can lead to costly mistakes
—Be Afraid of What You Can’t See—the ultimate cost of wearing emotional blinders around the truly disturbed/criminal, from sexual predation to domestic abuse, stalking and cyberstalking

Readers will learn how to:
—avoid selective attention
—observe people over time (bad guys rely on first impressions)
—ask questions: most people’s favorite topic is themselves
—cybersleuth to verify information and track down inconsistencies

You need this book if you:
—want to know if a potential boyfriend is trustworthy
—are interviewing or hiring new employees
—are selecting anyone to take care of your children
—are lending money or property
—have partners in business

WENDY L. PATRICK is a Deputy District Attorney and team leader in the Sex Crimes and Stalking Division of the San Diego County District Attorney’s Office. She serves as Co-Chair of both the Statewide California District Attorneys Association Sexually Violent Predator Committee and the Human Trafficking Committee. Patrick is the co-author of the revised edition of Reading People.